Things to say…. when things don’t happen

An exercise in excuses.

Scenario: Failure to get IIM calls despite being so damn sure of getting them, even before writing the exam.

1) They changed the pattern from paper/pencil to online. What choice did I have but to fall like the Indian hockey team did when the turf changed from grass to astro.

2) (If VA performance was good and Quant wasn’t) Damn those village idiots. You know how many of them take this exam just because it’s there to be taken? All they do is math for the complete duration. Indians are good at two things 1: Staying virgin, 2: Doing math. I say discard all the quant scores of people who get less than 50 percentile in Verbal.

3) I took the test on the 1st day itself. Little did I know then, that people on subsequent days were going to attempt 60/60. Why did I take it on the 1st day? The stupid college of mine had decided to schedule the semester exams from the day next.

4) They reduced the number of questions from 90 to 60. It’s not like I can’t do 60 in 2 hrs. Had they given 90 questions, I’d have done 60 but since they gave 60, I ended up doing only 45.

5) It was like playing an ODI on an Indian pitch. I was solid as ever and played the traditional shots. How was I to know that slogs, ugly heaves, outside edges were equally, if not more, fetching.

6) I emulated my South African idols. I was a favorite before it began but eventually, I fell short on the big occasion.

7) The coaching I took, on your insistence, ruined me. They taught me how to deal patiently with seaming conditions. I continued with the same safe outlook even on a flat deck.

8) I’m a fresher (with <8 GPA). Those guys need only the ones with experience. Don’t know why they even allowed me to write the exam.

9) Waise bhi, not getting through was a good thing. Just imagine how much work they would have extracted from me once I got there. I get exhausted just by imagining it.

10) Only when you’ve lost everything, are you free to do anything. So… you have any openings?

p.s: The excuses may or may not be mine. Feel free to use them when a sympathetic glance comes your way.

Only for the eyes of the regular readers: For some unknown reason, Vatican Donkey refuses to comply with the terms and conditions of IIIT Blogroll. So reverted back.. albeit temporarily, for better visitor stats. Also, you might have missed out on reading about my nemesis.

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5 Replies to “Things to say…. when things don’t happen”

  1. Nice one there….But slightly below your regular standard……Dude you probably had a 100 percent accuracy if u got 99.4 with 45 attempts πŸ™‚

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